Walking, Talking And Jogging…With God

The development our home sits within is a virtual concrete corn maze.  Rumor has it cars have entered never to be seen again.

There are two ways to exit the development.  One of them is very, very cumbersome…featuring multiple speed bumps (unappealing to the global majority who likes to speed)…depositing you on a side road that really doesn’t get you where you ultimately might want to go…regardless of your destination.  No disrespect to the road intended…it’s just a road…to nowhere.

The other way to exit the development.  The only other way.  The way that gets you to roads that take you somewhere.

The entrance.

Since this is a huge development, there is a tremendous amount of activity at the entrance/exit.  There are at least six school buses that either stop directly across from it or enter the development itself to pick up and drop off students.  Rumor has it the bus companies require potential drivers to memorize the nooks and crannies of the development and demonstrate their memorization skills accordingly before ever being allowed to approach it.

And of course, since the development is huge…there are people.  Lots of people.  People who like to take walks.  People who like to take walks with their dogs.  People who like to jog.  People who like to jog with their dogs.  (I can only assume cats who live in the development have no interest in physical activity)

And of course, all the people driving in and out of the development 24/7…since it is the preferred, essentially only way to go to and fro.

The entrance/exit itself presents physical challenges both coming and going.

Entering the development, you hopefully are always aware as you are making the BLIND turn a stop sign awaits seconds later.  The stop sign is necessary as cars/buses and/or people with/without dogs can be headed your way either from the left or the right.  Not to mention trash trucks, recycling trucks, delivery trucks, etc.  Not to mention one or two cars might be waiting just like you’ll have to.

And as you may have guessed by now, as you are exiting the development you hopefully are always aware as you are making the BLIND turn a stop sign awaits seconds later.  Complete with all the afore-mentioned potential obstacles.

Yes, someone had to be BLIND to construct such a high-volume entrance/exit for a huge housing development in this configuration.  This labyrinth of living deserved a much better fate.  I am confident all our various street addresses are coded with a giant “X” on auto insurance computer systems throughout the region…and agents break out in a “happy dance” each time they sign up one of us who has a residence within.

Now that I think of it, we do get a huge amount of insurance solicitations in the mail here.

Now that the scene has been set, we come to the events of this morning…

Timing the exit from the development this morning with the schedule of the school buses, I was confident as I made my BLIND turn to leave there would be no students on the two curbs, in the road, etc.  My rate of incidence was reduced to the potential of two cars waiting at the stop sign (a third would be in view in time to easily stop behind)…and people and animals out and about.  Being 7 AM or so, I had a good feeling when I made the BLIND turn to find no cars in front of me at the stop sign I was moments away from freeing myself.

Until the woman appeared out of nowhere moving from right to left.  Walking very quickly.  On a cell phone.  Obviously wrapped up in a very animated, intense conversation.

So wrapped up she didn’t see me.  She just walked into the street in front of the stop sign…curb to curb across the entrance/exit…without breaking stride…without looking…talking on her phone.

She obviously was talking to God.

She had to be scheduling her arrival in Heaven because anyone who pulled that stunt at this entrance/exit could only have been making final destination plans.  Final, final destination plans.

I guess I was a bit jealous she had God’s cell number…but I shook that off, pulled away and executed my errands.

Upon return to the entrance/exit later this morning all was clear as I carefully made my stop to ensure there was no one or nothing looking to depart.

Until the man appeared out of nowhere moving from right to left.  Jogging very slowly.  With a dog.  Wrapped up in the exercise of both.  In the street.

He obviously was jogging with God. (As was his canine…)

At least they were not crossing directly in front of the stop sign as the woman on the phone did.  I had some seconds to absorb their appearance before bashing them with my bumper.  But they were indeed jogging in the street…which led me to believe their relationship with God, like the woman, had to be close indeed.

We have gone to great lengths to provide people and animals alike that traverse within the development with sidewalks.  They are kept up to code and there is no Earthly reason why people and/or animals should not utilize them at all times, especially in the vicinity of the entrance/exit.

Their presence today required me to go into the opposing path of traffic as I navigated around them.  Fortunately, the way was clear and neither my drive nor their jog was interrupted.

I don’t know if the woman on the phone or the man and the dog truly have made their peace with departing the development for “greener pastures” and/or have a closer relationship to God than I dobut God knows I’ve made peace with driving at a maximum of one MPH each day I head out for the entrance/exit.

It’s OK by me if Heaven only has one road in.  I would have an issue with any stop signs.  I trust no one will be exiting.

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About sportsattitudes

I'm Bruce. Born, raised and still outside the City of Brotherly Love. Managed (so far) to visit a dozen of our United States and Canada (twice). Addicted from birth to Television/Movies/Sports. Took three years of French and got credit for two of 'em.
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12 Responses to Walking, Talking And Jogging…With God

  1. I have to proceed cautiously on my street too. It’s a one way, but for some it’s the wrong way.

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    • Which reminds me…we seem to have a current epidemic in Philly of people driving the wrong way based on recent news. I did that once. ONCE was all it took. 25 years ago, I was turning onto Roosevelt Blvd. Please understand there are sixteen lanes – eight in each direction – separated by small median strips after each four. I got disoriented and turned “too soon” and headed North on one of the two Southbound sections of four lanes. I recognized my error in about five seconds- cars rocketing at you will do that – and took corrective action. Like I said…it only had to happen ONCE.

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  2. “It’s OK by me if Heaven only has one road in. I would have an issue with any stop signs. I trust no one will be exiting.” ~ what a fantastic closing sentence! I don’t know how you do it…such an amazing writer! 🙂

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  3. Thank you for the kind words, PCC. So very much appreciated considering they are coming from someone with your writing talent. The feeling is mutual!

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  4. This is an amazing post – I know that sounds trite and cliche -but you’re created something really thoughtful …really special…I’m at a loss it’s so good. So I’ll just say thanks. Great read ( see, I’m still trying here….)

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  5. Pammy Girl says:

    I usually take the bus to work but last week I knew I would be staying decently late so I drove. During the morning commute there is one left turn which continues to plague me–usually due to the “landscaping” in the middle of the road to beautify the city. But this one morning it was a pedestrian who saw the sign clock down 5, 4, 3, 2… and then decided to start walking. As soon as the light turned green, he was in front of my car. He wasn’t crazy; he wasn’t a tourist. He was just a jerk. I honked at him. He then stopped, pulled out a cigarette, lit in and just stared at me… defying me to hit him.

    I honked. The people behind me honked. He flipped me off and went on his merry way. I can’t decide which one of us had a more interesting conversation with God that morning.

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  6. Rick Gleason says:

    You left out bicycling!

    Bicyclists in downtown Seattle are definitely in constant communication with God with no worries about traffic or pedestrians

    If ever you do acquire His number please let me know.

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  7. Quirky Girl says:

    Having the direct number to God sure saved those people, didn’t it? Apparently it wasn’t quite time to wrap things up and discuss their “final plans.” 😀

    Liked by 1 person

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